ARE YOU WITH THE RIGHT PARTNER?

During a seminar, a woman asked,” How do I know if I am with the right person?”

The author then noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so he said, “It depends. Is that your partner?”

In all seriousness, she answered “How did you know?”

“Let me answer this question because the chances are good that it’s weighing on your mind.” replied the author.

Here’s the answer:

Every relationship has a cycle… In the beginning; you fall in love with your partner. You anticipate their calls, want their touch, and like their idiosyncrasies. Falling in love wasn’t hard. In fact, it was a completely natural and spontaneous experience. You didn’t have to DO anything. That’s why it’s called “falling” in love.

People in love sometimes say, I was swept of my feet. Picture the expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something happened TO YOU.

Falling in love is a passive and spontaneous experience. But after a few months or years of being together, the euphoria of love fades. It’s a natural cycle of EVERY relationship.

Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse’s idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts. The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship; you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.

At this point, you and/or your partner might start asking, “Am I with the right person?” And as you reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else. This is when relationships breakdown.

The key to succeeding in a relationship is not finding the right person; it’s learning to love the person you found.

People blame their partners for their unhappiness and look outside for fulfillment. Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes.

Infidelity is the most common. But sometimes people turn to work, a hobby, friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances. But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your relationship. It lies within it.

I’m not saying that you couldn’t fall in love with someone else. You could. And TEMPORARILY you’d feel better. But you’d be in the same situation a few years later.

Because (listen carefully to this)

The key to succeeding in a relationship is not finding the right person; it’s learning to love the Person you found.

SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. You have to work on it day in and day out. It takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly, it demands WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make it work. Make no mistake about it.

Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things you can do (with or without your partner), just as there are physical laws of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. If you know how to apply these laws, the results are predictable.

Love is therefore a “decision”. Not just a feeling.

Remember this always: the universe determines who walks into your life. It is up to you to decide who you let walk away, who you let stay, and who you refuse to let go!

Source: http://crownmalone.tumblr.com/post/47594867142/are-you-with-the-right-partner-during-a-seminar

How to tell if a girl likes you

Source : http://www.tsbmag.com

 

 

How many times have you been twenty minutes into a conversation witha woman … and asking yourself ‘Does she like me or is she just being polite?’

It would be so much easier if they just came right out and said it, wouldn’t it?

But they won’t.

It’s up to you, as a man, to take notice of the subtle signals a woman is giving you, and act accordingly.

It you don’t have your eyes wide open for these signals you may wind up in a dead end conversation with a girl who has no interest in you past the free drinks you’ve been feeding her…

Or even worse … you may wind up walking away from a girl who is practically jumping at the chance to follow you back to your place and tear your clothes off.

So what are these subtle signals you should be looking out for?  What are other way how to tell if a girl likes you?

Signs a woman might be interested?

All of the signs below, in isolation, don’t necessarily mean a woman is into you. But as you begin to see several of these signals of interest, you can be certain that, at the very least, you’ve got enough rapport to begin to escalate the conversation to a more intimate level.

1. She is laughing at your jokes, even when they’re not funny

If a girl is being the perfect audience, laughing on cue, egging you on to talk more, and has a big smiled plastered across her face the entire time you’re talking it is a pretty clear indication that she’s enjoying your company.

When we laugh at someone we unconsciously are saying “I like you. And I’m listening to what you’re saying.” And if she is going out of her way to make sure that she’s laughing … she is also going out of her way to encourage you to keep talking.

Just be careful not to confuse true laughter with an “oh my god get me out of here” grin or a nervous giggle.

2. She tells you to take a sip of her drink

This one has been an almost 100% indicator for me over the years that a woman was ready to be kissed.

If you’re at a bar talking to a woman, and she hands you her drink and says something like “Try my drink.” Or if she encourages you in any way to take a sip of her drink, she is unconsciously telling you that she is comfortable with you on a more intimate level.  This is a great “little known”  how to tell if a girl likes you.

3. She asks you if you have a girlfriend or pries for the information

When a woman is around a man that she is becoming attracted to, she will almost always try to find out if he has a girlfriend.

Most women will flat out ask.

If she doesn’t flat out ask, she’ll most likely ask questions that pry for the information like “Who do you live with?” Or if you just told a story about going on vacation or to a concert, she’ll say “Who did you go with?”

If a woman has no interest in you whatsoever, she very rarely will care whether or not you have a girlfriend.

How to Win a Girl’s Heart

Source : http://www.wikihow.com/

 

1. Don’t come on too strong early. Let the relationship develop at its own pace. Coming on too strong early will almost certainly creep her out.
2. Be brave. Most girls like people with confidence, not an ego. Just walk up to her and start a simple conversation. She’ll get the hint that you are interested in her.
3. Do not ever treat her as she were merely an item. No one likes to feel used and unloved.
4. Prove that you really like her. Show that you’re not simply crushing or lusting for her. Ask her about herself, talk to her. Don’t just move in for the kiss. Listen to her and look her in the eye.
5. Memorize her eye color. Do this by looking at them as much as you can when you’re talking with her. It wouldn’t be a bad idea to do this for every woman you meet.
6. Care for her. Ask her about her day. It’s a simple way to show her that you are interested in what she does, and that you do care. When she starts to talk, you must give her your full attention. Look her in the eye. And most importantly, don’t interrupt. Ask her questions about it because it will show her that you are listening. Offer to help her.
7. Make sure to be good friends with her friends. If her friends like you, you’ll have a better chance of winning her over. After all, girls often turn to their friends for advice and for a second opinion. So it’s best if her friends have a high opinion of you.
8. Make her feel like the most beautiful thing in the world. You can actually directly say that. Girls love to be complimented and to know that they are beautiful, but don’t overdo it, particularly in a new friendship. Just saying something like, “You look really nice today” will make her happy. As long as you’re sincere and mean it. If you are not, they will not trust your opinion on other things.
9. Make sure she feels safe with you. Most girls want to have someone they can trust and turn to when something goes wrong. And even when she is having a good day, let her know you’re interested in how she’s doing. If you know that she has plans after work or school, ask her how it went. If you let on that you like her, she’ll eventually pick up on the hints. You don’t even have to come out and say it. She’ll probably pick up on it already.
10. Feel good and bad for her. If she had gotten a perfect score on her math test, be cheerful about it! If she was having a bad day, let her know that you feel her pain and that you want her to feel better. Attempt to make her feel better, if you can.
11. If you can make a girl laugh, you’ll get further with her. But don’t take advantage of this. Let her be your best friend first, then ease into things. A girl needs to know that she can trust you, and that you’re not going to break her heart because you really do care about her. Girls love to laugh and will laugh at anything you say, even if its not funny.
12. Let her wear your jacket if she’s cold. It makes an even bigger impression if you take it off of your back and give it to her to wear, but make sure it’s clean and smells decent. In doing this, you show a girl that you care about her. She will feel safe and cared.
13. Have good hygiene. Women take pride in hygiene and if a man or woman has good hygiene, it works really well on her. The opposite, bad hygiene, is usually an immediate deal-breaker. Believe it or not, fresh, clean-smelling hair is a really good thing. And, a fresh-smelling body is a must-have. A sweaty, smelly body means you’re out.
14. Don’t play games. It’s a waste of time and gets a relationship headed in the wrong direction. If you try to start a relationship on something false (like you say you’ve had a multi-year relationship yet you’ve never even had a girlfriend), that is most likely where you will end up. Cute little flirting or teasing is okay, but never pretend to be someone you’re not. If you think the girl is only in the relationship for one thing, and you’re in it for another, don’t just play along to keep her with you. Tell her what you’re looking for and try and make her see what really counts.
15. Be sincere. Compliments, flirting, teasing, carefulness — none of it matters unless you truly do care.
16. Love her for her quirks. Everyone has something they don’t like about the person they love, but if you have too many big things on that list, you need the boot. You need to love her for the things that make her special, for her uniqueness. Tell her so. For example, “I love your freckles.” A simple thing like that that you know she may be insecure about can really mean a lot to a girl.
17. If you are thinking something, tell her. If you can’t decipher her signals or see where she is going with what she’s doing/saying, tell her that. It’s best just to get it out there, and see what she says. If you’re unsure of what is going on, or how she’s treating you, tell her that. If you get it out there right away, the problem can be fixed and the relationship can stay healthy. But don’t shoot your mouth off. In these situations, you need to think twice and speak once.
18. Love who she is, inside and out. And show it. This is the most important step.

 

Waving goodbye to 2010 and embracing a new beginning to 2011

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30^th Dec 2010, the day Champagne JSG held its year end review meeting. To reward ourselves for working so hard for this one year, we treated ourselves to a lunch meeting at this nice and cosy place in Dempsey Hills, surrounded by greenery and fresh air. Ah ha, what better way than to start off the meeting with a toast of mojito and a red wine? Here is Gracelyn proposing a toast to Champagne JSG. Well, our brains cannot work on an empty stomach can we? We ordered some pasta, a duck leg salad, and a rosti with rib-eye steak. Yummy, don’t you wish you are also here with us? The duck salad tastes perfect with it tangy mandarin orange dressing and my favourite rocket leaves. The rosti with rib-eye steak is a very tasty combination; just imagine your usual jacket potato replaced by pan fried potato strips. The steak is very nicely done; it is tender and maintains the juicy beefy taste. I must say the vongole linguine is a little disappointing but with the other two dishes, the drinks and the nice ambience, this becomes a very forgivable imperfection.

Ok, before this becomes like a “I eat, I shoot, I post” food blog, let’s get back to business. We reviewed our achievements made in 2010, and are satisfied with the results in terms of meeting our targets for number of matches made, number of new events organised, and a good estimate of successful couples we bring together in the process. It is important we remain sincere and listen keenly to our members’ feedback to improve ourselves. Planning our roadmaps for 2011 is one important part of this meeting. Coming 2011, there will be four main areas we will be focusing our efforts on:

• To organise many more fun, creative and fresh events to keep our members’ social calendar full.
• To invest and expand our marketing channels in order to attract more members.
• To constantly improve on our backend matching process to churn our more successful matches.
• To hold talks and seminars to share our match making experiences with our members in order to help them get luckier in love.

2011 will definitely be an even more exciting year.

To have a sweet ending and beginning literally, we cannot do without deserts! The carrot cake and the strawberry sponge cake look cute isn’t it? They taste as good as it looks.

This is truly a sweet ending to 2010 and a good beginning to 2011. Last but not least, we would like to thank everyone for all your support. Thanks for contributing your photos for our blog, thanks for giving us feedback to improve, thanks for referring other friends to us, and thanks for being our friend.

Have a good 2011 ahead!

-Joan, 3^rd Jan 2011

Why am I still single?

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That’s a good question to ponder over, but also one that I dread my parents and relatives asking me over the Chinese New Year, when will it ever stop? I guess when I finally find myself a boyfriend to present to them.

I am not ugly; in fact, I do think that I am above average like many have told me. I am educated, nice to people and dress well. So what’s the problem if you ask me? I have had a few serious relationships, I had been in love, and I dated men I loved but did not work out eventually.

To be honest, I am quite sick of it, tired of being with someone for years and to realize how incompatible we are later on. When the initial attraction and passion have faded, what is left of it? The things you found to be adorable and attractive in the beginning then began to annoy you, sometimes either of us took each other for granted, we got bored of one another and then came the split mounting to the reason that we were too different. Or worse, they were already on the lookout while in the relationship. It happened to me once and it just completely destroyed whatever we had built up together, the trust and commitment.

Why am I still looking then? Do you realise most of us actually are living to seek for a loved one we want to grow old with? Ultimately when we grow old and material possessions lose its importance, the thing that will last till we die is love (from our children and grandchildren).

Some people told me this before, and I actually thought it was nonsense. They told me the person they married is their best friend. Now I am starting to believe in it. So what to fall back on after the initial honeymoon stage is over, the answer is a solid friendship. Looks will fade, initial attraction will be worn out, and it really does take a lot more to make a relationship last than you think. So I reckon if you are also your partner’s best friend, life will be a lot easier. We don’t try to change our friends, do we? We accept them for who they are, and that’s probably the reason why best friends last forever!

I am single now, but it doesn’t mean I stop dating or meeting people. I enjoy my freedom; I like to keep my options open. I meet people and form new friendships, some might last and some might not. I don’t have expectations, I don’t set standards, and I just let things happen naturally. It might be a long and tough process, especially considering how many people live in Singapore at the moment, and I am not meeting 0.01% of them, maybe not even 0.001%! How I wish I can meet more people just to speed things up 😉

Then I thought of this idea, how about joining some events organised by a dating agency? It will create chances for me with guys I never will bump into at the clubs, on the streets or through my friends, and best of all, it does the filtering according to my preferences (e.g. common lifestyle and being a non-smoker). So for now, I’m just going to enjoy my single life, get to know many of these wonderful men till the right one wins my heart!

 

From forum : What should I do to marry a rich guy?

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I’m going to be honest of what I’m going to say here. I’m 25 this year. I’m very pretty, have style and good taste. I wish to marry a guy with $500k annual salary or above. You might say that I’m greedy, but an annual salary of $1M is considered only as middle class in New York. My requirement is not high. Is there anyone in this forum who has an income of $500k annual salary? Are you all married?

I wanted to ask:
what should I do to marry rich persons like you? Among those I’ve dated, the richest is $250k annual income, and it seems that this is my upper limit. If someone is going to move into high cost residential area on the west of New York CityGarden(?), $250k annual income is not enough.

I’m here humbly to ask a few questions:

1. Where do most rich bachelors hang out? (Please list down the names and addresses of bars, restaurant, gym)
2. Which age group should I target?
3. Why most wives of the riches is only average-looking? I’ve met a few girls who doesn’t have looks and are not interesting, but they are able to marry rich guys.
4. How do you decide who can be your wife, and who can only be your girlfriend? My target now is to get married)

Ms. Pretty

Awesome reply:

Dear Ms. Pretty,

I have read your post with great interest. Guess there are lots of girls out there who have similar questions like yours.
Please allow me to analyse your situation as a professional investor. My annual income is more than $500k, which meets your requirement, so I hope everyone believes that I’m not wasting time here.

From the standpoint of a business person, it is a bad decision to marry you. The answer is very simple, so let me explain. Put the details aside, what you’re trying to do is an exchange of “beauty” and “money”: Person A provides beauty, and Person B pays for it, fair and square.

However, there’s a deadly problem here, your beauty will fade, but my money will not be gone without any good reason. The fact is, my income might increase from year to year, but you can’t be prettier year after year. Hence from the viewpoint of economics, I am an appreciation asset, and you are a depreciation asset. It’s not just normal depreciation, but exponential depreciation. If that is your only asset, your value will be much worried 10 years later. By the terms we use in Wall Street, every trading has a position, dating with you is also a “trading position”. If the trade value dropped we will sell it and it is not a good idea to keep it for long term – same goes with the marriage that you wanted. It might be cruel to say this, but in order to make a wiser decision any assets with great depreciation value will be sold or “leased”.

Anyone with over $500k annual income is not a fool; we would only date you, but will not marry you. I would advice that you forget looking for any clues to marry a rich guy. And by the way, you could make yourself to become a rich person with $500k annual income. This has better chance than finding a rich fool.

Hope this reply helps. If you are interested in “leasing” services, do contact me…

signed,
J.P. Morgan

Best and Worst Dating Experience

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Hi there,

I happen to browse through your website when I saw the section on “Blog Me”. After seeing the topic, I decided I must tell you about my worst dating experience.

It wasn’t too long ago where I met this chap in school. He is an average looking guy, short and plumb and do not have that interesting features. But he is a nice guy and was asked me out on a date on various occassions. I rejected few times until I realised I should give him a chance since we could get a long so well and prolly because I pitied him as well because he had never been out on a date. He asked me in February for a date for July because he wanted it to be after his exams. Meanwhile he asked me where I would like to go, what I would like to do, where we could have our lunch etc. Somehow I was looking forward for July despite me not being too keen.

As the day got nearer, he brought up on the date again and asked what my curfew were like, where I would like to go etc. One day before the scheduled date, he called to confirm plans and asked where I would like to go. Me being extra nice, I told him to tell me the place and time and I will be there. And he chose to meet at 1030am at AMK (where he lives) for the first show! When asked why so early, he said he like to start the day early. And why AMK (far away from my place), he said he doesn’t like going out of his “territory”. Anyway, I was looking forward to it thinking the day is going to be filled with so much of activities.

I wore my best dress and make-up (I hardly wear make-up) and met him. I was shocked to see him. He was in his bright orange shorts, black old tee, haversack bag and unshaven face. What a disappointment!

He asked what movie I would like to watch and every movie I mentioned, he said he can watch it the second time (because he had already watched it) which made me feel bad so I told him we can watch something else he hasn’t watched. He didn’t offer to pay my ticket nor buy me a drink or popcorn. Luckily I ate my breakfast and brought extra cash.

After the movie, he asked where I would like to have lunch and jokingly told him KFC and he really brought me to one and I had to pay for my own lunch. He didn’t offer to pay again!

I didn’t want to ruin the day so I kept mum about it the whole time. While we were engrossed in a conversation, he cut me off and told me he’ll send me to the MRT station to send me off. I was shocked! I cancelled all my other appointments thinking I was going to be out the whole day and night and in the end, I left at 245pm.

He didn’t call me to check if I have reached home safely until we were online that night at 11pm and asked if I had fun that day. I was so pissed I told him off and never met nor spoke to him again. I only say Hi whenever I see him in school.

Clearly this guy have not made any effort to find out what he should do on a first date and he has ruined the opportunity just like that.

I do have interesting dates and best dates but this incident has topped my list. Hahaha!

P.S: Please do not disclose my name. Thank you!

—

Best Regards,
“Joy” – Not her real name

Falling in love with the wrong person

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If you’re a woman like me, you are probably sick of dating boring men who have no suggestions to what to do on a date, inflexible to go on to go on a spontaneous holiday. Worst of all, unable to surprise! Why can’t the nice guys be a little more interesting, fun and unpredictable?

One evening party at a pub, I met Jack. He was fun, relaxed and made me laugh. He was not afraid to spill his history of disastrous dates and even laughed at them. He never hid what in his mind. After a few drinks, no one would expect that he looked straight into my eyes and told me how different I am from all the girls he had dated before.I was totally caught in surprised and mesmerized by him. He asked for my number and I gave him. And with that we got on into a relationship.

Unlike my ex-boyfriend, the only activities we did during the weekend were watching television at home, dinner at a food court or watch some boring movie. Jack wasn’t anything like those boring chaps I dated, he surprised me by remembering things I said, brought me to my favourite restaurant even there was no special occasion, and he was always up for anything fun and spontaneous. At times, he would send me a last-minute text and appeared right under my flat to pick me up. He constantly intrigued me and it kept me hooked. I was totally into him.

My best friends advised me not to get fooled by all his sweet talks. I am sure girls would like to hear those things, right? And deep inside our heart, we wanted to believe that he really mean it.

Jack and I had great times doing things everything together. I listened to him and we emptied all our savings to travel to Japan, Europe and many other countries. We went to different hotel restaurants for dinner every Saturday. After dinner, we went straight to pub for party and hang out with his cool friends. He always told me life is short, enjoy the moment. His favourite quote, “Why save some much money for the future that still far away. Spend and enjoy!”

My parents hated Jack. It was a totally nightmare when I brought him back home to visit my parents. He was rude. He told my parents that he never have any plans for the future, as in “our future”. However, I always believe I could change Jack.

This went on for a year, till it dawned upon me if we would progress any further. So I decided to take a risk and took him to look at some wedding bands when we were out shopping. I waited and hoped for the day he would finally ask me for my hand.

One Sunday came, he hugged me affectionately and I thought it was going to be that special moment. Instead, he broke the devastating news to me; he wanted us to stop seeing each other.He told me he met a girl from London on the internet a year ago. And recently they had decided to travel around with world together for a year. He said if I am looking for a guy to settle down, he couldn’t commit to more and said I deserved someone better.

It was so sudden, and everything in my world just collapsed.

Jack was everything I could ask for… Unfortunately, to him I wasn’t of any significance but probably only a short-termed companion. The time when we were together are the best times of my life, but it left me hanging there all of a sudden now. I was definitely heartbroken, hurt and I felt betrayed. He promised to love me, but it wasn’t forever. All the things he has said replayed over and over again in my mind, and now this were all turned into plain lies! He is a liar!

I don’t specifically go for bad guys, however, bad guys are just attractive, cool with lots of character. Women yearns to meet someone who could make a difference into our lives, to complement what we already are, to be cared and to be loved. It will be an extra bonus if the man can bring thrills and surprises to our lives. Is that too much to ask for it?

Written by Champagne JSG Member

Rowan Atkinson Live – Elementary Dating

Dating an older woman

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I am a man who loves dating younger women… until recently. It was at May’s wedding, this beautiful woman caught my eyes. Her name is Jenny, she exudes confidence, is graceful and most of all, we seem to get along pretty well. May whom is our mutual friend, introduced us and this is how it got started. After the wedding, we decided to keep in touch and established our “friendship” in Facebook.

There was so much I didn’t know about her, and being her friend on Facebook opens up this chance to explore.

Big news! I realised she is 3 years older. For my past 30 years, I have not dated someone older, and somehow age seems to put up a little barrier here. I asked myself if it is really important, I looked at all my friends whom are dating younger women or much younger ones, they didn’t seem to be much better off really. Growing up in a family as the youngest, I have 2 sisters. Suddenly, this feels like I’d be dating someone as old as my sister. May saw it through me, and she told me how wonderful Jenny is, and encouraged me to see her and ask her out. I would never know what could happen if I didn’t…

And so I did.

Pleasantly enough, the first date with Jenny turned out to be awesome. Unlike the younger women I went out with, she wasn’t petty with details. She offered to go on dutch on the dinner, wasn’t expecting me to hold the door for her, didn’t try to impress me with extra thick make-up or wearing a super mini skirt. Jenny was just being herself, and I enjoyed her company. She could hold up conversation about financial investment, long-termed goals and not just talk about all the shopping and recent purchases which other girls did. I had to admit after that date, I was quite attracted to her. We went out a few more times, and she was still the Jenny I met, she didn’t put up a nice front to impress me in the beginning.

Suddenly, the age difference loses its importance, I like going out with Jenny for who she is, and not how old she is! It has been over 8 months now, and we are still going strong! I’m not envious of my friends whom have much younger girlfriends whom might be prettier, more youthful and even those that like to show more skin. To me, Jenny is the sexiest woman in my life and she keeps me captivated!

I just like to share this with all the other men who have been hesitant to date an older woman, you never know what a gem she can be if you can’t overcome your psychological barrier about age limit! Go on and give it a try!